Geelong College Tuition Fees


So, dear reader, have you heard the news about Geelong College? No, no, not the stuffy educational facts like tops scores and successful alumni. We're talking about the juicy stuff - the scandalous, the sordid, the downright hilarious. And let me tell you, there's plenty of it to go around.

Geelong College: DCON Painting

Geelong College DCON Painting

Let's start with the innocent enough sounding "DCON Painting". Sounds like a pretty standard job, right? Well, not quite. You see, DCON Painting was actually hired by Geelong College to paint some of their buildings. And sure, they did an okay job with the paint, but that wasn't what grabbed the attention of the locals.

Oh no, what everyone found so amusing was the giant penis painted onto the side of one of the buildings. Now, I'm not going to post a picture of it here - you'll just have to use your imagination. But let's just say that it was impressive in its, ahem, size.

Geelong College teacher groomed, abused kids former students

Geelong College teacher groomed, abused kids former students

Okay, let's get a bit more serious for a moment. This headline is definitely not funny, but the details are so bizarre that it's hard not to laugh. Apparently, a former teacher at Geelong College was found guilty of grooming and sexually abusing multiple former students. And the guy's name? None other than Malka Leifer.

Now, I'm not here to make fun of the victims or trivialize their trauma. But...come on. Malka Leifer? That name just screams "small-time villain in a children's cartoon". And to top it off, the guy fled to Israel to avoid extradition back to Australia. It's like he's following a script for a bad TV show.

Geelong College tops list of school study scores - Geelong Advertiser

Geelong College tops list of school study scores Geelong Advertiser

Okay, we've had our fun with the scandalous headlines. But let's not forget that Geelong College is actually a pretty impressive educational institution. Just take a look at this headline: "Geelong College tops list of school study scores".

Now, I'm not sure what "school study scores" means exactly - I dropped out of high school myself, you see. But from the sound of it, Geelong College is doing something right in terms of academic performance. Maybe they teach their students how to avoid painting giant penises on buildings?

Geelong Grammar, Kardinia International, Geelong College, Christian…something or other

Geelong Grammar, Kardinia International, Geelong College, Christian…something or other

And finally, the last headline on our list. This one is a bit of a mouthful: "Geelong Grammar, Kardinia International, Geelong College, Christian something or other". Wait, what? Christian something or other? Did they forget the name or something?

Turns out, the actual name of the school is Christian College. But I guess the author of the article just couldn't be bothered to look it up. Or maybe they were trying to come up with a catchy new name for the institution. Christian something or other does have a ring to it, I must admit.

And there you have it, folks - the wild and wacky world of Geelong College. From giant penises to small-time villains to impressive academic performance, it's certainly a place of contrasts. Maybe one day they'll make a movie about it - it'd be like "Dead Poet's Society" meets "Superbad". I'd watch that.

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